In a shocking turn of events, a 40-year-old man has finally beaten the classic video game Contra without using the infamous Konami Code cheat. According to sources, the man, who has chosen to remain anonymous, has been playing Contra since he was a child and…
In a surprising turn of events, venture firms are turning to railroads as a promising investment opportunity during the ongoing economic recession. According to sources, venture firms have been pouring money into the railroad industry, seeing it as a stable and reliable source of income…
In a shocking turn of events, tech mogul Elon Musk has purchased Twitter and is turning it into a bird sanctuary. According to sources, Musk, who has long been an advocate for animal rights, was inspired to buy the social media platform after hearing about…
In a shocking turn of events, a local boy has discovered that he is not, in fact, human, but is actually a goat. According to sources, the boy, 10-year-old Timmy Johnson, made the discovery after noticing that he had goat-like features, such as hooves and…
A local teenager, Alice Johnson, has made a surprising discovery: she has the ability to fly. According to sources close to Alice, she first realized she had this ability when she was playing with her friends in the park. She says that she was running…